Yes, I am parked behind this computer for many hours every day.  Yes, the yard is untouched, except that we have trimmed the lawn to a uniform height and are putting up with the growing patches of brown.  Yes, my “holidays” have been put on hold, and when I go away with the kids I bring a computer and an internet stick.  Should I take a look at finding some balance in my life?

Let me pass along an analogy I’ve found incredibly helpful in times like this.  Many lifestyle coaches advise us to achieve balance in our life.  So we feel we need to carefully plan each day with the right amount of work, rest, “quality time” and so on.  It’s fine advice if you have a routine that you have set – great for maintaining a pattern that is already clicking along.

But what about when you are giving birth to something new?  As a mother of three, let me tell you that during labour there is no question of taking a break and finding balance.  You are in it for the long haul and until that baby comes out, you’re not doing anything else.  People who are adept at starting new ventures know that giving birth to a new idea is much the same.  At times like this, the best you can hope for is harmony.

By thinking of harmony instead of balance, you give yourself permission to let different “instruments” take centre stage in your life for a time, and it’s ok if sometimes the effect of the moment is a high-volume guitar solo, or an aria.  That solo will last a moment or two, then it ends and something else becomes the focus of the music.  Harmony expects rests along with the melody, and crescendos as well as quiet.  A piece of music that is “balanced” throughout risks blandness.  Achieving harmony in your life requires you to look at the bigger patterns, and plan beyond the day-to-day.  Harmony sometimes demands all-out performance, then a period of recovery.  And it seems to me that harmony will create a more dynamic result than carefully-maintained balance.

So the next time a well-meaning friend tells you that you need more balance in your life – ask them to look at the bigger picture.  Maybe you are creating something bigger, and more harmonious, than they can see from close up.

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Jogging past my strolling neighbours, I found myself chatting in tiny bursts: “Cute dog!” “I like your stick!” “Good afternoon” – and nearly all these little exchanges were marked with a smile back, or another comment. By the end of 40 minutes’ running, I had exchanged greetings with dozens of people – what’s more, I felt wonderful… connected, even.

I’ve been quite active on Twitter.com for a couple of months, and thinking about the nature of this communication medium: 140 characters to answer the question, as Chris Brogan says, “What has your attention?”. (While the twitter.com home page asks “What are you doing?”, Twitter seems to have evolved beyond the scope of that starting point, and attention is what it’s all about.) That’s just enough for a decent sentence, a quick response, or a kind comment. It’s an awful lot like greeting the folks you meet on the street, or on the seawall.

And to me, that similarity marks the return of something we’ve been in danger of losing – that casual but kind human contact. When we lived in smaller communities, the friendly greeting was commonplace. Everyone knew everyone else’s face, but didn’t necessarly want to become intimate friends with all their fellow citizens. It made sense to lubricate social interaction with a little small talk.

Now, with our big-box stores and freeways, we’ve lost that opportunity for the most part. Seawall friendliness is the exception rather than the rule. And that makes places like Twitter more important than you might imagine. It’s becoming the 21st-century equivalent of the village square, the promenade, the church social. We tweet because we’re human.

I’m not saying that we should all be updating our Facefook status and posting to Twitter multiple times a day. In fact, I’d promote the opposite – take the “listening” skills and the short communication that you learn online, and try applying it to the real world. Next time you are stuck in the grocery line-up, faced with catching up on the tabloid news headlines or choosing which package of gum to add to your purchase, try “tweeting” the person standing in line beside you. It can be something simple, like “wow, look how many magazine covers have the same people on them this week”, or even the classic comment about the weather. You might get a reply. You’ll certainly have made the world a slightly friendlier place.

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In fact, I hardly feel like it’s a “disorder” I’m living with at this point, partly because it’s as much a part of me as my green eyes and left-handedness, and partly because in the last few years I’ve learned to use some terrific tools and strategies that enhance my strengths and minimize the, uh, “foggy” side of me.

In this blog, I’ll look at the characteristics of ADD as it often manifests in girls and women, how I came to be classified with this “label”, what I’ve worked to overcome, and the many treatments, both medical and behavioural, that we can choose from as individuals living and even thriving with ADD.

It will go beyond ADD as well, and explore the potential of the human mind, the plasticity of our remarkable brain, and the infinite possibilities that absolutely are still the birthright of you and every person, whatever your situation and whatever struggles you work to overcome.

I’m sure I’ll find a place on this blog for the requisite disclaimers.  I’m not a doctor or a psychologist, and of course I recommend that you consult with your own medical professional in the process of diagnosing, treating and ultimately living with ADD or any other condition that resembles it (and believe me, ADD comes in many packages.  What works for me won’t work for everyone, and vice versa).

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